chase my dreams my foot

i showed my parents this cos maybe i can finally get started on what i want. but i find that my parents have serious fucking trust issues omg. if this is fucking proven to be like a good company or something, JUST FUCKING TRUST THEM. i get that you're worried about my safety and i'm thankful for that. i'm thankful that you care about me. but seriously. do i look that gullible to you? do i look that desperate to you? i know there've been stories where people have been so desperate for such a job that they're willing to do anything -ahem- R rated stuff -ahem-. but i'm not that crazy ohkay? if i cant do it i wont force it. i'm someone who believes everything happens for a reason so if i dont get it then so be it.

but seriously. just because not everyone is nice and honest doesnt mean that everyone is mean and dishonest right?! if so, then how do i know that you're not one of those mean and dishonest people? for all i know you could've been lying to me my whole life, even though i seriously doubt that. but the two of you need to seriously get past your trust issues ohkay. it's bad enough that i dont trust people enough to read this blog (or it could be just that i dont like it), our family doesnt need two more people that dont trust a single soul. it's bad enough that when i was a little girl i had thought i was adopted (dont ask me why. i guess it was because i was so different from everyone) but now with so much similarities to my parents i can safely say i'm not. (i used to think i was adopted because i didnt have those newborn photos where you're really really NEWBORN wrapped in the blanket and everything)

so really, learn to trust people. although still i'm not gonna willingly give this blog to anyone lol. if random people find it, by all means, read it. i couldn't care less. but if it's someone i know then the story's a little different. i guess it'd be ohkay if i didnt know. afterall, what i dont know wont hurt me. just dont tell me haha.

ohkay i'm tired and it's really hot so bye

xoxo

Hope™

Ps. like that how am i supposed to chase my dreams? (i realised i forgot to make sense with the title LOL). my dream is to be something in the media. be it an actress, singer, dancer something like that. it's what i want. i'm so scared now. i'm so scared that i'd end up with a job i dislike. i'm so scared that i'd end up having some boring job in an office just randomly sorting stuff. how am i supposed to do this seriously? if i could do it without parents' consent i'd so do it ohkay. i was still thinking that this could be a big chance for me, something God planned for me. should i just try? just see first haha. but it's a saturday and i cant afford to miss anymore ballet lessons. or else i wont be able to go exam. and ballet=dance, even though i dont exactly like this form of dance. i wish i can find some other way to learn other types of dances that i might be interested in. anyone reading this (if there're even people), can someone help me? thanks. (: this is a damn long PS. haha